No title for a very long post....

I'm looking at the computer screen, and honestly, I can't even come up with a title for this blog entry.....so does that tell you anything?

We were supposed to have (which by now means, we did not have) a training class on Saturday. It was mandated by the state that all foster/adoptive parents had to complete this training by March 1st, which was Saturday. Our agency only informed us of the new mandated class on the 19th of February, so we didn't have much time. They quickly put something together to get us trained on the 1st. Well, at 8:30am Saturday morning, we received a call cancelling the class. The State requires the presenter to have a Master's Degree and you guessed it...our's did not. While we were not disappointed to find out we wouldn't have to spend a nice Saturday in yet another training, we were upset at the fact that now we were not in compliance with the State's regulations. Our caseworker quickly told us that we would not be at fault for this mishap, since it was the agency's fault in not getting us trained on time. Now, all this means is that we will have to take the class on another day in the near future.

We were also supposed to meet with our CW before the class. This "meeting" has been cancelled and rescheduled so many times, I don't even remember when we were first supposed to meet, but thankfully she came out to our house on Saturday afternoon. All she needed to do was deliver the Adoptive Parent Handbook for us to read......handbook?! I don't really call a 4 inch 3-ringed binder a handbook! Thankfully she trusts us to read it and didn't go through the whole book (like she is supposed to). I can't say that I was in a rush to read that handbook from cover to cover, and to be honest, it is still sitting on the dining room table where she left it.

Michael & I have been praying about what to do and how to approach things with our CW, as we have been quite discouraged with the process to date. We are now in our 15th month of our adoption process and while we knew that the process would take time, we did not anticipate this long! As I sat and talked with our CW on Saturday, some specific prayers were answered and direction was provided ~ even without her knowing and wtihout me actually having to ask these questions! Thank you Lord!


1. What is going on with our agency? CW told us that they are financially hurting, have had 4 CWs quit in the last 4 months and the remaining CWs are so overworked they don't even know what to do. This is information she probably shouldn't have shared with us, but thankful she did.

2. Why is it taking so long for us? CW once again expressed her feelings of how upset she is that it has taken us so long. She indicated to us that CPS states that a family should be matched within 3 months and 6 months at the longest. This would happen when the criteria the family has set is just unattainable, which she confirmed was not the case with us.

3. Should we consider transfering our file to another agency now that we're licensed? CW actually encouraged us to contact another agency about transfering our file. The name of the agency that she suggested JUST SO HAPPENS to be the same agency that I received a newsletter from the very same morning. I had never heard of this agency before, nor had I ever received any information from them before. Their newsletter JUST showed up in my mailbox. Of course, when I got it and read it, I didn't think twice about it, since I've signed up for so many things I've lost track. Hmmmm.....

4. What about going through CPS directly? CW said that if she had the chance to go back and work with CPS directly, she would. She said, in passing, that we could go directly through CPS and not an agency. This would greatly increase our visibility, as all cases go through CPS and are then funneled out to all the other agencies.

5. Should we consider changing our status to get more exposure? CW suggested that we change our status from adoption-only to foster-to-adopt, if even for exposure. She said it's almost like applying for a job. You put your name out there as much as possible, to gain the most exposure, in hopes that someone along the lines will see your resume enough or recognize your name, and want to know more.

6. What about contacting that attorney to get his opinion on our situation? As the CW was leaving she said - oh yeah, one more thing....did you guys ever contact the attorney that I told you about? If not, you really should.

OK....wow!

We have really become so dishearted and discouraged. We are angry...and not necessarily at the situation but more because our joy really has been robbed of us through this process. We've almost become complacent and expectant of things to not go right for us...and that is what makes us angry! With all that being said, we also know that God is in control, that everything has a purpose, that God's timing is perfect and when this is all said and done, we know that it will all be worth it....but we're not there yet. We're still in the waiting.

So, today, we woke up with a new outlook on things.

*We contacted the agency recommended and they are sending us out an application to fill out. Thankfully it's just an application and they request the remaining information from our current agency. They review our file and homestudy and tell us whether or not they accept us. They said that the process is quick (of course, the definition of "quick" has changed dramatically for us in the last year).

*We changed our status from adoption only to foster-to-adopt with our agency this morning, so that we can have more exposure to needy children in the CPS system.

*We are contacting the attorney to just get an opinion of where we are. He has personally adopted 5 children from foster care and would be a great resource.

*We are going to contact CPS to see what our options are with going directly through them. This is no easy task as I have been routed to 4 different people already this morning, without getting any information.

Please continue to pray for us. We know that God is GOOD and FAITHFUL! He is with us on this journey, but we still have tough days!