Pneumonia

Maggie started coughing and it kept getting worse with each day. After 4 days of hacking and 2 nights without sleep, I took her to the urgent care after work.  Of course, while there, she never coughed once. Why does this always happen?! I'm sure that they thought that I was just an over protective momma (which I am, thank you very much) but Maggie has suffered from upper respiratory infections, bronchitis and pneumonia too many times for me to ignore the symptoms. I knew that it would only get worse.  The dr on call didn't really feel that any medications were necessary or X-rays required, but I insisted on the X-ray. Sure glad I did.  Maggie had pneumonia in her lower lobes.  So, they gave her a Rx for an antibiotic and a cough suppressant/anti-histamine/decongestant combo.   At least the antibiotic was only a 5 day course (versus the 10 or 14 days we usually get) but that 1/4 teaspoon of the combo med sent her reeling through the rough....and you know, my girl doesn't need any help on the energy side of life!  So, we stopped that medication and just went back to the over the counter stuff, which seemed to be helping now.

Maggie stayed home from school Thursday & Friday (which means Momma also stayed home from work).  Maggie only wants Momma when she is sick, but thankfully is a great sick kiddo - meaning, she's not whiny, clingy, etc. However, the flip side of that is that she really needed to be still and rest and well....yeah, that wasn't going to happen.

We followed up with her regular pediatrician on Friday and they determined that she also had an ear infection. Bummer. Her first one since she had tubes put in 2 years ago. Yes, she still has her tubes in and for the last year, the drs have said - "oh they're right there...just about to fall out" and yet, they have remained. No one has suggested surgery to remove them (like you're supposed to have done if they don't fall out on their own after a year) and as long as the drs aren't concerned about it, neither am I.  No need for unnecessary surgery!

We rested all weekend, which meant that we had to miss out on our annual Crews trip to the lake. Oh how I know how much she would've loved swimming, tubing, and boating with all her cousins, but I'm fairly certain that she needed the rest much more than the busy, wet, hot day of non-stop activity.  She slept for 4 hours that afternoon ~ enough said.

She is well on her way back to being in good health. Her cough still lingers but it usually takes a while for her coughs to go away. She's a trooper and we're just glad that she's resilent and better :)

Here's a picture of her right after the dr told her she had pneumonia...poor thing!

p.s. Because of Maggie's illness, we had to reschedule her follow up with TCH Sleep Center to get her results from her latest sleep study test.  Unfortunately, we'll have to wait until mid-October to find out anything. Heaven forbid if the dr could actually just give you the information over the phone....but I won't go there. :)

All over the place

We are on our 4th week of school. Hard to believe. But since school started, it seems like life is just flying by and we're busier than ever. Hence, the reason to a lack of blogging.

~SCHOOL~
Maggie has done really well in her class. She has adjusted well to the bigger classroom, new friends, new schedule, new room and her teacher. She has done really well with adjusting to going every day, versus just 3 days a week. I honestly knew that she would be just fine, but I'm just glad that I was right :)

There have been a few days that I have actually made good timing from work to school and picked Maggie up a little early. You'd think that was a good thing, but no. My sweet girl is not happy when Momma arrives early. This cuts into her play time with her friends. Her teacher says that it's a great compliment when the child cries upon leaving school - so I will take that for what it is. So, now, if I see that I'm running a little early, I just run an errand or sit in the car and catch up on my facebook or emails, until I think it's been long enough for her to enjoy some time outside.

We enrolled Maggie in gymnastics twice a week at school and she just loves it. Her little active self is doing so well and comes home after her classes to show off her new skills. Not only will it be great for her to release some energy (smile) but she's just a natural athlete. I'm just thankful that it's at school during the day and we're not having to add in something extra at the end of the day.

~THERAPY~
We're SUPPOSED to have play therapy once a week. However, it hasn't taken place in a month. Once because our therapist was out of town. The following week, I had a blow out on my way home from work. (yah- that was fun - NOT) The next week, her therapist was sick. And just last week, on my way to get Maggie from school, I had yet another flat tire. So, here's hoping that we can pick it back up next week and get back in the groove of things.

Speech therapy hasn't started yet, as we had to do another evaluation at the therapy center last week. I was a bit frustrated because they said that further testing needed to be done as they felt that the testing performed by Texas Children's wasn't in depth enough. Ok fine. However, they did the exact same testing. Word for word. Question for question. Ugh. I'm sure it was just another way of them getting paid. The conclusions/diagnosis were the same and they're supposed to contact us in a couple of weeks with their recommendations and go from there.

~ACTIVITIES~
The past few weekends have been busy. We've enjoyed playdates with our toddler friends, celebrating birthdays with family, going to the splashpad with our cousins, swimming with friends, and enjoying some nicer weather outside, with a few trips to the park. It's been raining for days but hopefully there will be some end in sight. We cannot wait for cooler weather, as Maggie loves being outside.

~HEALTH~
Maggie had her first dental procedure a few weeks ago. Due to the circumstances of her pre-natal "life", Maggie's teeth are extremely weak and therefore, this time around had 7 teeth that needed to be worked on. Poor thing. Due to her age, the dentist had to sedate her. She was a champ! They were able to work on 4 teeth the first time (more than they thought they would be able to do) and therefore just has to go back one more time at the end of the month to complete the work. She loves going to the dentist and was actually crying when she had to leave. Not a typical scene at the dentist's office. She handled the sedation just fine and did great without me being in the room with her. When they were done, they brought her out to me and she looked like a little drunken baby. She couldn't stand up or walk, although she thought she was just fine. I wish I had a video camera with me - it was hilarious. She came home and slept for almost 6 hours without any movement. I'm pretty sure I haven't seen that before :) She woke up and was back to her normal, active self. I'm just thankful that she did so well and pray that she continues to have a great affection for the dentist office.

We head out to TCH tomorrow to get the results of her latest sleep study test. It will be interesting to see if there were any changes in her sleep apnea in the past year and if there will be any changes to her treatment plan. I'm more than certain that it hasn't improved; I'm just hoping that it hasn't gotten any worse.

~Miscellaneous~
I have to interject that I am more than excited about my fall TV programming starting back up in the coming weeks.  TV is my "guilty pleasure/downtime".  I have my favorites and am curious about some of the new shows that have been advertised for months now. We rarely get to watch "live" TV ~ my DVR is one of my best friends.  He's been pretty lonely this summer, but have no fear, he's clear and ready to get back to work.

Michael & I are doing well. We have both lost a lot of weight this summer and feeling so good.  I've lost 20 pounds, 23 inches and down 2 sizes. Yay! I hope to lose just as much on my next round, starting in a few weeks. It hasn't been too bad and our lifestyle has truly changed. Thankful for the positive changes in our lives and how it has just blessed us a family of 3.

Well, I think that pretty much covers "all over the place".....until next time :)

Walking Humbly

I received an email from one of my many adoption resources and just had to share. Although I haven't been a mother for 20+ years, or have biological children, I could totally relate...and I know many of my other foster/adoptive momma friends out there can too. It really encouraged me ~ hope it will do the same for you!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Recently, a friend and I leaned against my kitchen counter, watching our children play in the backyard. As we sipped coffee we chatted about a young couple in our church that is in the process of adopting two children. We reminisced about the time when we were in their shoes, recalling how little we truly knew and understood about the road that lay ahead. My friend and I agreed — we wished we could share all we have learned since that time about adopting children from “hard places.” We wished that someone had done the same for us.


As we talked, I realized that much of what we have learned along the way might be helpful to more than just this couple. They are good lessons and timely reminders for all of us who are on the adoption journey, no matter how far along.

I would encourage my friends to give up their pride and their desire to compare. I thought I was a fairly humble person, but adopting my children has brought me to my knees when it comes to thinking highly of myself and my capabilities as a mother. My oldest daughter was a hard baby and a challenging toddler, but once I got on the ‘Christian Mommy Discipline Train,’ she shaped up pretty well. That doesn’t mean I never had a child misbehave or throw a tantrum in public. I won’t even mention the time that four-year-old Noah pulled the fire alarm at church and the congregation had to evacuate the building. There were embarrassing moments to be sure. But this…this kind of parenting brings a different sort of humility.

In my first 20 years of being a mother, before adopting, I was never so stumped or so completely empty of wisdom as I have been at times in trying to be a good parent to the children we have welcomed into our lives through adoption. I never read so many books, pored over so many websites, or called so many experts in search of help. I never took my child to a therapist or felt that I might need one myself. I never called my husband home from work because a child was so distressed or out-of-control that I couldn’t keep everyone safe—and not just once, but many times. And as someone who was a passionate homeschooler, I never had to seek out alternatives to homeschooling because it wasn’t working. I never thought about acronyms such as IEP, RAD, or PTSD. I never sent an email to my friends telling them I couldn’t manage the summer on my own, and asking if they would be willing to help. Based on my years of experience as a successful parent, I thought I had it all figured out, only to find out that as we began the adoption journey I was, in many ways, completely starting over.

But I quickly learned that there were many other things I did not know from my previous years as a mother. I didn’t know the indescribable joy of watching a child fall in love with me. I didn’t know the beauty of holding a child in my arms and fiercely loving her even though I had only met her weeks before. I didn’t know the agony of waiting for a child who was 8,000 miles away, or seeing her turn her face to me for the first time and come into my arms. I didn’t know the hope I would feel when I saw sad and tender tears on my child’s face for the first time, after months of anger and frustration. I didn’t know how incredible it would feel to hear my child say, “I love you, Mommy. You are the best Mom!” when I knew this was truly a revelation to her.

To those who are considering adopting a child from a “hard place” as well as those who are already traveling this journey toward healing, I say: be ready to lay down your pride and abandon yourself to love. It will be different than you think—better in some ways and much harder in others. Find a few people you can trust, friends you can call at any hour, friends who will understand and love your children even when they seem unlovable. Don’t pressure your child to become like your other children who have been raised with loving guidance and discipline since birth. And do not, under any circumstances, compare your newly adopted child with your friends’ children. You will live to regret it. Rather, give your child time and permission to heal, and become a committed and active participant in that healing. It won’t be easy nor is it likely to come quickly. This healing will take a great deal of your time, energy, and finances…but give it all away for your child’s sake.

I have come to learn that it is precisely this kind of adoption journey – a journey of humility, selflessness and sacrificial love – that God called us to when He called us to adopt. I suppose Eby’s vacation Bible school verse says it best:

He has shown you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you? But to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God. — Micah 6:8

Amen.

*written by Lisa Qualls

First day of school

Summer is over and it's time for a new school year. Moving up to the "big kids" class. Same school. New teacher. New friends & classmates. New playground. New activites. New adventures. And uniforms.

Yep, uniforms. Can't believe that my 3 year old is wearing a school uniform. While it's expensive, it sure makes getting dressed in the morning easier. Well, at least that's what I thought anyway.

So, this morning, while getting Maggie ready for school, I pull out her khaki shorts and red polo uniform shirt. She immediately starts to cry.

"Why are you crying, sweet pea?"
"I don't want to wear that ugly shirt, Momma." (I started laughing so hard!)
"It's not ugly. Isn't the red pretty?"

"NO, it's not." (She felt pretty strongly about it too)

"Why do I have to wear an ugly shirt?"

"All the big kids have to wear these pretty red shirts now."

"Well, why can't the babies wear the ugly shirts?"

(trying to contain myself, I'm not actually sure what I said but my thoughts went immediately to - hey listen, this is just one of the many tortures of growing up...better get used to it...but I'm pretty sure I just said something like, "sorry sweets...you just have to wear it"

Since she was returning to the same school, our routine stayed the same. Thankfully. She understood that she would be going to the same school but would be in a different classroom with different friends and a different teacher. After about a month of explaining this daily, she was ready and ok with that on the first day of school (whew!)

We walked into the play room (where she goes for early extended care) and she looks in the window and stops dead in her tracks....

"MOMMA....the BOYS are wearing MY shirt, too?! Ugh!!!"

I just laughed, smile, gave my girl a kiss and wished her a good day. That had to be one of the funniest things she's done so far. She was JUST beside herself that a boy was wearing the same shirt. Oh how I love my very girlie girl!

*************

I ran into Maggie's teacher on my way to pick her up that afternoon. I asked how she did. Her teacher was very sweet and said "well, she definitely has a lot of energy"(understatement!) I laughed. Then she said, "I will not kid you. She did not listen very well the first time around, but by the second request, she would finally do what she was asked/told." Yep. That's my Maggie. I asked her if she took a nap and she laughed. Oh no. What?

She said that Maggie laid down on her mat and was quiet but was not still. She just kept spinning round and roung on her back and stomach. Mrs. S knew immediately that Maggie needed to burn off some energy before she could fall asleep. So, she went up to Maggie and asked her if she'd like to go for a walk. Maggie said sure! Mrs. S. loaded up a backpack with some books and asked Maggie to put it on for their walk (such a smart lady!) and they went walking around the halls and the gym. Every now and then, Maggie would say, "Mrs. S, I'm getting tired. I'm ready to go back now." and they would walk just a little bit longer. She told me that they'd run into other teachers who would just laugh at the sight of it ~ laughing because they know Maggie (apparently EVERYONE knows Maggie....is that a good thing?!? and because they knew what Mrs. S was doing!) So, they started walking back and Maggie said, "Mrs. S, I am REALLY tired. I need to take my nap." They walked back to the room, Maggie dropped that backpack, immediately laid down, put her hands up under her chin and was fast asleep.

Not only was I glad to hear that Maggie took a nap, but more importantly that she has a teacher who is understanding of her individual needs and personality, and who was willing to do something different because of it.

I think Maggie's going to have a great time this year in Mrs. S's class.

Day with Nana & Dandy

My mom and dad (aka Nana & Dandy) have always been very involved with the grandkids and love to spend time with them ~ special one on one time with each one (there are 7 kiddos between all of us), going to all their plays/musicals/sporting events, having craft parties, etc. I've always loved that about my parents. We had that when we were growing up with my dad's parents, and we are all still very close to my Mamaw & Grandad. I was always hopeful that my children would have that same type of relationship with my parents.

Nana & Dandy have been wanting to have Maggie over for quite some time, but Maggie's been slow to go places without us. Actually, the only time she's been away from one of us has been at school or church nursery. So, I decided to just bite the bullet, asked Mom & Dad about a good day to have Maggie come over and see how it goes. We talked it up quite a bit ~ she doesn't deal well with surprises. She loves her Nana & Dandy but again, is somewhat reluctant to just go off with them, or anyone else.

So, Saturday morning, I drove Maggie over to my parents house and she just couldn't wait to get there. Mom has PLENTY of things to keep all of the kids occupied and Maggie went straight for the toy cabinet. We chatted a few minutes and then I left, without any incident. Maggie was already working on her 3rd or 4th activity by that time.

Mom said that they'd see us about 5pm and to enjoy the day. What?! 7 whole hours by ourselves?! We honestly haven't had that in 2 years. We've not been able to spend any large amount of time together, just as a couple, since we brought Maggie home (unless it happened to be a school day or something small like that). This momma and daddy weren't even sure what we were going to do with ourselves, but we quickly developed a game plan. We had a nice quiet lunch together, actually had good conversation without constant interruption, and enjoyed a movie (again, uninterrupted!). We just enjoyed spending time together and enjoying each other's company. We were rejuvenated and ready to see our sweet girl that evening.

When I went to pick Maggie up, I was anxious to hear how she did. I was good and didn't call to check up on her. I figured if something went horribly wrong, they would've called. They said she did great, kept them busy (understatement of the year), she didn't take a nap, but they had lots of fun. She came home dressed in a ballerina leotard and tutu with a princess crown and wand. Oh I knew she had a wonderful time.

Dad sent me pictures of their time together and I just had to laugh. I'm pretty sure that she kept them on their toes because of all the different activies she participated in...her attention is captured for about 3 minutes and then she's done. I saw pictures of dancing, cheerleading, painting, playing games, putting together puzzles, drawing, washing dishes, watering flowers, playing outside, playing with baby dolls, putting on funny masks and hats, playing dress up....just to name a few :)

 

She was so happy when she came home. She couldn't stop talking about everything she did with Nana & Dandy...that is, until she fell fast asleep in the car about 2 minutes into the ride home.

As much as she needed a nap, I'm fairly certain that Nana & Dandy needed one even more.

I'm so glad that Maggie was able to spend the day with her Nana & Dandy.....grandparents who love her completely and fully and want to know her so intimately. We are so blessed to have my parents in the same town and to be able to share our lives with each other.

Can't wait for the next Nana & Dandy day....although I think my folks are still recouperating :)

Meet the Teacher

Maggie's staying at the same school this year (Northland Christian School) but she is moving up to the Preschool Older 3 year old class. This means a new teacher, a new schedule and uniforms!

Mrs. Salinas has been teaching at NCS for over 20 years and just loves it. You can tell. She first called to introduce herself and we chatted for about 20 minutes. It was nice to be able to do that, and I appreciated her taking the time to do it.

We went to school to meet Mrs. Salinas and to check out Maggie's new classroom. WOW! The room is massive, with so much stuff, I think I was actually overly-stimulated! (ha!) Maggie is in a class with only girls this year. She was the only girl last year, so this will be a big change for her. I think she'll really enjoy it. She always said that the boys were mean :).

We talked to Mrs. Salinas for a while but the one thing that really resonated with me was one statement she made. "I just want you to know that I will be loving your baby every day." Wow. That had to be the best thing she could've said. While I hope Maggie has a wonderful year of learning, gaining confidence, growth, and lots of fun...it does this Momma's heart good to know that the one who will be caring for her every day, is going to be covering her little one with love. I couldn't ask for more than that.

Sleep Study Test

It was that time of year again....time for the annual sleep study test. Since this was going to be Maggie's 4th test, I figured it would be pretty easy. Ha! Um, that would be a big negatory folks.

Maggie was diagnosed with sleep apnea before she came into our care but the former foster parents chose to ignore the symptoms. As soon as she came home to us, we started working right away on getting her set up for more studies, etc. The first sleep study wasn't too bad because it was without the mask. They had to determine what her "normal" levels were and that would determine course of action. This is when they determined that removing her tonsils and adenoids would be most advantageous and hopefully that would "cure it". We had the surgery done and it was amazing to see the difference almost immediately. She wasn't snoring like a freight train and she could finally learn to breathe through her nose (versus just mouth breathing). She always sounded a bit like Darth Vader!

Our 2nd study was a basic test again, just to see if the surgery had fixed everything. Alas, it did not. Boo. We really thought that her apnea was gone, since her breathing/snoring issues had improved. She still thrashed around all night but then again, she is just a little on the active side :) so we didn't think much about it.

Third test was ordered with the full CPAP mask. This determined that she did have severe sleep apnea and would need to be on the CPAP machine, indefinitely -- and most likely for life. The doctors did not feel that she would outgrow this (although it does happen).

The CPAP machine was ordered and eventually she grew accustomed to it. Whew - that was a hard adjustment. I wouldn't want that thing on me either. However, she sleeps through the night without hardly moving a muscle. And on those occasions that she chooses to not wear the mask (meaning when I just don't feel like fighting with her over it), we can see a big difference in how she sleeps and how she is the next day. This is when I tell myself that it's worth the fight the night before, so that I don't have to deal with the devil child the next day :)

So, when it was time for the annual sleep test, I figured it would be really easy. She's been wearing the mask for over a year now, without any problems. She helps to put it on and is the only one who can start and stop it!

Alas, my dream of an easy night passed pretty quickly. First of all, there was a little one in the room next door and it was her first time being tested. Enough said there. Poor thing. She SCREAMED for HOURS...NO exaggeration there folks. I felt so bad for her and for her momma.

Maggie was fine when the technician started putting the wires on her. We had a great tech ~ she interacted very playfully with Maggie and she seemed to really like her. The main issue is that it takes FOREVER to get everything set up and like I've said just a few times before, Maggie is pretty active and doesn't really do well with just sitting still and not touching anything. Moving on.

2 1/2 hours later, everything is set. Wires/electrodes are tested and we're given 5 minutes for lights out. First of all, you're in a completely different environment. It's not your room or your bed. Your routine is completely ruined. (Maggie doesn't handle change in routine well). She's also not allowed to eat or drink anything due to aspiration issues, although my child has managed to learn how to do both at home without any issues. But due to liability issues, they wouldn't allow it in the room. This caused another breakdown on my sweet baby since she couldn't drink anything and she always goes to bed with something to drink. (Something we are still working on but haven't felt the need to destroy that need of Maggie's quite yet). Between the foreign room, wires and machines everywhere, no drink and screaming baby next door, it took just a little while for Maggie to fall asleep. I guess 2 hours would be just a little while, right?!

Oh yeah, this was a really sweet moment in the midst of chaos. Maggie was almost asleep but she could still hear the little girl screaming in the other room. She looked up at me sleepily and said, "Momma, I'm gonna pray for that baby to stop screaming and go nigh-night." I said ok and she immediately prayed "Dear Jesus. Help that baby stop screaming and go nigh-night. Thank you Jesus. Amen." Oh my sweet girl.

Oh and the doctors ordered a half & half study. This meant that they would do without the mask for the first few hours and then "just come in" and put the mask on her in the middle of the night. Oh. Great. Yeah. That's not going to work. And I was right. Maggie finally fell asleep around 10pm. Tech comes in at 1:45 to put on mask. Wakes her up. She is NOT happy. Does NOT want it on and proceeds to cry and scream for 2 hours. She FINALLY fell back to sleep at 3:30. I was about ready to walk about but I just kept telling myself that she'll fall asleep in just a minute....

6:30am ~ we're woken up, everything is removed and we're out the door in about 30 minutes. Funny how it takes 2 1/2 hours to set up and less than a half hour to get it all off.

We won't have the results for another month (the soonest appointment I could get) but I doubt that anything has changed. Thankfully we don't have to do another test for another year.

All marked up and ready to be wired up

All hooked up ~ think they have enough wires?!

So thankful for this light toy ~ it was a lifesaver!

Yay! All done....get this stuff off of me!

A little frustrated.....

I got the report from the speech pathologist in the mail on Wednesday. I was actually shocked to receive it in less than a week, since my last experience with medical records did not go as well (if you recall). I scanned and emailed it to the therapy center we've chosen for Maggie for their review. They reviewed it the very same day (yay!). They called me last night and said that they did not feel that TCH provided a thorough enough evaluation of Maggie and they feel she requires more testing to fully examine all her needs. 

While I was happy to hear that they are so thorough, I was frustrated because basically that evaluation at TCH is worthless (as well as my half day of vacation time that I took to take Maggie down there). Oh well. How are you going to know?

Ok, that's fine. Let's schedule further testing/evaluation. Well, because she's on Medicaid, we have to wait 30 days before another evaluation can be done.  What?! Are you kidding me? That's ridiculous. But that's the system folks. It is what it is. 

So, while I had hoped to get her in earlier and already have a few weeks under the belt before school started, I do feel confident that we have Maggie going to the right therapy center. It's just going to take a little longer than expected. Which is what I should've expected :)

De-clutter.....

I'm sure you will all agree with me when I say that we just have WAY TOO MUCH STUFF!  While looking through some old photos the other day, I came across a few of when we first moved into our house 3 years ago.  Man. Talk about organized. spotless. orderly. everything in it's place.  We had moved from a 700 sq foot little house into an 1800 sq foot house, so at the beginning, it looked quite sparce.  Um....not so much anymore. Add 3 years and 1 child later. Enough said!

I've been wanting to clean out things and declutter our house but just haven't had the energy or wanted to make the time for it.  Well, this weekend, I had this sudden urge to just do it.  But I decided to take it one step at a time, instead of my usual way of insisting that it all be done....right now!  So, as the weekend went by, I'd cleaned out this drawer, or that cabinet, this closet, organized this room. I went through every cabinet and drawer in the kitchen.  It's amazing what you find hidden.  You know all the little things that you put somewhere to just get it out of the way or because you're too lazy to go and put it back where it belongs. For instance, (not that I found any of these items in my kitchen or anything...) ~ screwdrivers, wrench, duct tape, measuring tape, broken candles, heating pad, receipts, bills, water gun, doll clothes, crayolas, pictures, art work, stickers, hand lotion, earrings, bracelets, toilet cleaner, dog toys ~ ok, I think I can stop now :) 

Anyhoo....

I was able to go through every cabinet and drawer in my kitchen, including the ever wonderful junk drawer (you know we all have one, or two, or three).  Reorganized the closet that holds all of our cleaning supplies and cleaning tools.  I think I'm covered with the vacuum, regular mop, wet swifter, regular swifter, electric broom....good grief!  I then moved to Maggie's play room.  Seriously, that girl has WAY too much stuff.  Ridiculous.  However, I do have to be very careful about getting rid of things with her, as she still has a hard time adjusting to things being taken from her or discarded.  She was playing with Buddy quite a bit, so it was a little easier to sneak things into the trash bag.  I also went through all of Maggie's clothes and shoes (watch out Sariyah!)

In the end, I threw out 2 bags of trash, have 2 bags for Goodwill and 2 bags for our friend, Sariyah. 

I'm not done but it sure does feel good to declutter!

Happy 2nd Gotcha Day!

Dear Maggie Joy,

Today marks the 2nd anniversary of the most important day of our lives.  The day you came home and we met you, our daughter! 

I can't believe it has already been 2 years, and yet it feels like it's been many more.  I don't even remember life before you, sweet girl.

I still remember being so nervous about meeting you. Wondering what it would be like to see your sweet face in front of me.  We had only seen a picture of you the week before, but it was engraved in our minds.  We instantly fell in love with you and knew at that moment, you were ours.

When we opened the door, our hearts exploded.  You were here. You were ours. Our family was now complete.

Momma & Daddy love you so much. How much?  Thiiiiiiiiiiiiissssss much!  You have brought us so much love, joy, happiness, and laughter.  We are so proud of you and so thankful for who you are.

When we prayed for God to bless us with our family, He blew our socks off.  We waited so long for you, Maggie Joy....and you were worth every minute of the waiting.

Always know that Momma & Daddy love you, that we are always here. We will never leave you.  You are always safe and always wanted. No matter what.

Thank you for changing our lives and for being our sweet daughter.

All our love,
Momma & Daddy

Underestimated & Validation

Maggie was a late talker. When she came to us at 17 months, she only spoke about 5 words.  Her vocabulary gradually grew and greatly improved when she started going to Mother's Day Out. However, she was still behind the "normal" track.  She was putting 2 words together around 2 1/2. Over the past few months, really since she started going to preschool, her vocabulary has just blossomed.  She is quite the talker but she has been a little difficult to understand.

Up until recently, we've had no problem interpreting what she was saying, although others struggled.  However, over the past few months, she has grown increasingly more difficult to understand ~ which has just caused her to get really frustrated ~ which is understandable. 

As she gained new experiences and spent more time away from us (aka at school), we were having a harder time understanding her conversations.  We no longer had the context in front of us. It's easy when it happens in front of you and you can figure out what they're talking about.  When her teacher and her play therapist also mentioned that she was hard to understand, we knew that we needed to do something. So, we moved forward with getting Maggie evaluated by a speech pathologist to see if therapy was needed.

On Thursday, we trekked down to TCH in the Medical Center and met with the speech pathologist to get Maggie evaluated.  Ms. Anna was really wonderful to work with and she was great with Maggie.  I was amazed at how well Maggie behaved (thank you!!!!).  The evaluation took about 45 minutes and Maggie actually sat still for the entire thing. This had never been seen before!  (those of you who have been around Maggie for longer than 5 minutes can attest to that!)

They go through a series of tests to check out her actual knowledge and comprehension. I sat in the corner in absolute awe at how well Maggie was doing.  As the tests got harder, I kept thinking - oh, there is no way she's going to know that answer...and then boom...she would answer it correctly.  I was just amazed.  I honestly felt like I should apologize to Maggie for underestimating her!  I mean, I always knew she was smart...but to have someone else tell you is pretty great!  In the end, Maggie scored at a 4+ year old level :)  This was one proud Momma.

Then she moved on to articulation....and this is where it got interesting. Maggie only passed at about 20% level for her age.  She scored below a 2 year old level.  Validation that this was necessary!

The pathologist recommended that Maggie start speech therapy as soon as possible, twice a week for an hour long session.  She wanted to encourage me that even though Maggie's issues were fairly significant, it wasn't without hope (and a lot of hard work!).  The common issues that kids Maggie's age have with speech are not a problem for Maggie.  Those tend to be worked through as time/education/age goes on.  Maggie's issues would definitely need assistance. 

We have tried to do as much as we can on our own (repeating everything she says back to her, asking her to show us what she's talking about, etc) but she needs further help.  So, we have already started working on getting her scheduled in to see a speech therapist not far from the house. Thankfully they are open 8-8 weekdays AND on Saturday!  The other groups are only 8-5 M-F....I just don't see how working parents  can do it?!  We are thankful to have found her therapy group and to be able to get in with them.  There are some insurance requirements (aka more paperwork/red tape) to get her approved for the therapy, but hopefully that won't take long, and we can get her started right away.

Our lives are about to get just a little busier, but it will all be worth it in the end.

Buddy

Our newest addition to our family arrived about a month ago (I know, I know..I'm lagging on the blogging!) We brought home a 14 week old, miniature dachshund.

We asked Maggie what she wanted to call him. She said puppy (of course). Then she said "boy". But after we explained that he needed his own individual name, something that only he would know, she kept calling him Buddy....and that stuck.

We've never had small dogs so this has been a little different, but one that we've gotten used to :) Everything is smaller, which is a good thing...and we have a lap dog that is truly a lap dog :) (not a 60 pound lab trying to be a lap dog!)

It has been an adjustment having a dog in the house again but it's also been really fun to watch Maggie bond with her "Buddy". She's also done a really great job of feeding him, making sure his water bowl is full, and loves to take him out on the leash. They wrestle, run, and play together all day long. I think Maggie may have found her match in Buddy!

When it rains...it pours....

and I'm not referring to the 11 straight days of rain here in Houston!

Sickness. Everywhere. Ugh!

It all began about 2 weeks ago when Maggie did something (who knows what?!) to her middle finger. Somehow it got infected and was getting pretty nasty. This had happened one other time before (actually during Hurricane Ike) and so I knew that she needed to get on some more antibiotics. So I called to make an appointment on Thursday for the following day, but they were actually going to be closed on Friday for the 4th of July holiday and would be opened on Monday. Ok. Fine. Scheduled it. In the meantime, Maggie was coughing...and coughing...and coughing...and it wasn't getting any better. However, over the long weekend, while taking one of her super long baths, the skin broke on her finger and it was almost instantly better. That was good...but her cough was bad. So, I was glad that I had the appointment.

On my day off from work (oh the joys of a out of the home working momma!), Maggie and I trekked up to her pediatrician and she was diagnosed with a bad case of bronchitis and also the flu. How in the world did this girl have the flu? She didn't even have a fever up until the time she was sitting in the room at the dr's office. They said she had the swine flu, but I'm not sure that's even possible, being that they usually have to send the cultures off for those results. I checked with her teacher at school and none of the other kids have been out sick, and we hadn't been around any sick kiddos/adults either. Hmmmmm.....anyway, we walked out of there with more albuterol, a cough medication, Tamiflu and Ibuprofen. This is one of those times that we are more than thankful for her Medicaid! The dr said that if she didn't improve, to bring her back in due to possible pneumonia (she sounded pretty raspy that day).

I still can't figure out how someone hasn't come up with a good cough syrup or remedy because NOTHING and I mean nothing has ever worked for Maggie and her coughs. That poor thing! The nights are especially difficult and due to all her congestion, she hasn't been able to sleep with her CPAP machine - which has just increased her sleeplessness.

Tuesday, was my turn to go to the doctor. The previous Thursday evening, I noticed that I had a small bite on my upper thigh but didn't think much of it. By Friday morning, it was quite iritated and hurt pretty bad. That same day, I was bit by something on my face in 2 different places while at work. All in all, 3 bites and no idea of what they were or how it happened. Again, they itched badly but I figured it would just go away. WRONG. I was absolutely miserable all weekend and even debated on going to the ER, because all 3 sites were highly infected and extremely painful. But I just kept telling myself that they would get better and to just suck it up.

Needless to say, I was in the dr's office on Tuesday ready to have my face and leg cut off :) So, I'm sitting in the room and my doctor (who is more like a friend and about my same age) walks in and says - hey what's up (without looking at me). Then he turns to me and says "OMG - what happened to your face?!" Of course, I said well, if you think that's bad, just take a look at this (my thigh). He literally jumped back and said - "whoa - that must hurt like a mother!" And he was right. He said he couldn't tell exactly what had bitten me but the sites were highly infected and they needed to be drained. OH great. Just what I wanted. He told me to lay back, relax and take a deep breath. Oh. My. Word. He did "deaden" it (if you can even call it that) but that shot to deaden it was horrible. Then he proceeded to cut open the site on my thigh... and well, let's just leave it at that, as I don't want to disgust anyone. A few minutes later, my 3 sites were either cut and/or drained and I was walking out of the office. Oh yeah, and I also have bronchitis.

Now, it's Wednesday and Maggie isn't any better....so I take her to the ER since her pediatrician can't perform a chest xray. The cough was worse and the chest xray did show a small spot on her left lung. It was very small but they wanted to treate it conservatively, so she was put on another mediation.

Today, I finally returned to work and made it half a day. Came home and crashed.

Like I said, when it rains, it pours...and here's to praying for a drought!

My day at the dentist

Last week, Maggie & I went to the dentist. Enough said, right?! Well, it seems like nothing ever easy happens and this would again be true for our adventures with the new dentist. I was excited when I found a dentist that would take both our private insurance as well as Maggie's. Kinda like hit it all at once. I was even more thrilled when I was able to get us both an appointment on the same day.

Now, Maggie had already had her checkup but needed to have some work done, which required sedation and her previous dentist didn't do that on kids so young. So, I found one who could.

When I was scheduling the appointments, I explained the situation, the lady was super nice and said that Maggie wouldn't need another exam - just have the records sent over and they'll do the work on the first visit. Score! She said that they would give her something to drink to sedate her, to not let her eat/drink after midnight (yikes!) and we'd see them at 9am. I knew that would be challenging but we could do it. In the meantime, they were also going to do my 6 month exam (now WAY past due!) while she was being worked on. I explained to the nice lady that this would probably not work well, but she insisted and said it was not going to be a problem. That should've been my clue there.

Maggie woke up the morning of the procedure at 1am...that's right...1am. And NEVER.WENT.BACK.TO.SLEEP. Ahem.

Can you hear me when I say MISERABLE?! on all parts...and mainly because my sleep deprived child was starving and dying or thirst and this poor momma was so horrible in not giving her anything. (poor thing - she didn't understand the need to fasting). We eventually made it through to the time to leave for the appointment, arriving there, paperwork was already filled out online (gotta love modern technology!) and then they bring out the scale to weigh Maggie. Oh great! Now, is that really something anyone fears when they are small?! (Granted I avoid the scale like the plague, I'm just sayin') but my dear sweet child is terrified of scales (and she doesn't even know what they are?!) So, she had a major meltdown...and I'm sure it didn't help that she hadn't slept, or had anything to eat or drink since the night before.

While trying to console my daughter, the nice lady behind the counter wanted to know how I thought we should handle the 2 appointments. I thought - seriously? Isn't that your job? She didn't see how it would be possible to accomodate us both. Really? You don't say. So, I said, well, then, let's get Maggie's stuff done since she's fasting. However, another lady came from out of nowhere and said, well, I don't think she's ready for sedation. She's quite active and seems very anxious about being here. Maybe we should just have you do your exam, she can watch you and then the next time you come in, she'll be more prepared.

Ok....first of all, she's 3. Period. Second of all, give her the sedation and she won't be active. Thirdly, this was your bright idea. Fourth, she's been to the dentist 5 other times without any issues and actually gets excited to have her teeth worked on. I explained this to them and they looked at me as if I were crazy. Fifth, how in the heck do you think you're going to actually get my exam done with this "active/anxious" child in the room with me. So, it was now my responsibility to get my dental exam done with my never sit still, starving, won't stop touching everything precious 3 year old daughter. Needless to say, Momma WAS NOT HAPPY. And when Momma ain't happy....

2 hours later....yep....2 hours later....

We were finished and I walked out of there totally frustrated and exhausted. Of course, it would be nice to say that everything came out great in my exam and I don't need any work done, but that would be the understatement of the day!

The dentist was super nice, was great with Maggie and looked at her teeth (yes, she cooperated very nicely, thank you very much!) and unfortunately she needs to have even more work done that previously thought. Her work will require 3 more visits, all under sedation. Oh how I am so not looking forward to this...but hopefully the next visit will be better!

Randomness

This post will be all over the place....you've been warned.

*I've been in a blogging funk for the past 2 weeks. Not sure why. Maybe it's because I'm too tired to remember the funny things to write, or too stressed to write down the hard times. Either way, I've been in a funk.

*Last Friday night, my friend, Jess, and I surprised our friend, Joc, for her birthday. You want to talk about challenging. Between the phone calls, emails, texting, between me, Jess, Joc's mom and sister ~ I was beginning to wonder if it was actually going to happen. But it did ~ and we totally surprised her. It was just so nice to sit at a table, just the 3 of us...to be able to have a conversation without interruption (except for our bouts of laughter). Happy Birthday, Joc. Sure do hope that you have had a wonderful time celebrating your birthday. Praying that this next year is just beyond all that you could hope for!

*2 more little kiddos in our lives are one step closer to being out of foster care and with their forever families. We are so happy for Tiger and Hollis and their sweet families. It's been so neat to be on the other end and encouraging those who are coming up behind us! Praying that many more families will see the joy that it is to call one of these children your own and feel compelled to move forward to expanding their families!

*Our CFO came in for a week from our Paris office. It was my first time to meet him. It's a bit strange when your boss is younger than you! But he was great and we got along really well. Even though I am confident in my skillset and what I bring to my job, I was happy to hear that he was pleased with my work and the job that I am doing. Always nice to hear "job well done."

*We have a family member ~ 14 week old miniature dachshund named Buddy. There were 2 puppies left. I immediately wanted one of the pups but the other pup wanted Maggie. They say that your pet will pick you and indeed he did. Their personalities are quite similiar ~ fiesty, fast, never ceasing, but extremely sweet. So, we have been in puppy mode for a few weeks now and overall, it has been relatively easy. There have been a few moments where I was reminded why we didn't have a dog for a while now ~ but Maggie's happy! She and Buddy became best friends fast.

* Michael celebrated his 2nd Father's Day this year. Each year just gets a little sweeter. Maggie and I got up early, made his favorite breakfast and enjoyed our day together. Maggie made a really cute card for Daddy @ school and he couldn't have been more proud. Lots of laughter, playing and relaxing that day. Oh how I love to hear Maggie playing with her Daddy. They truly are quite the pair.

* All the siblings and children were invited over to my sister & brother in law's (Lesley & Bobby) new house for lunch. Chaotic but the kids always have so much fun together. We had a great lunch and loved seeing their new home. We couldn't be happier for them.

*Wimbledon. Dual screens at work. Momma happy! I've always loved tennis. Played when I was younger and have followed it for many MANY years. Wimbledon started on Monday and I couldn't have been happier...until I realized that you'd have to pay to see the beginning matches of Wimbledon. So I resorted to just listening to Wimbledon radio (yep - that pretty much describes my level of being a fan!). The commentators were funny to listen to and I heard some great matches. Then we were finally able to watch online and that's the first site that is brought up each day at work. I have dual screens and this week, more than ever, I have realized the great potential and necessity of 2 monitors! Tennis history was made on Thursday when American John Isner played Nicolas Mahut from France. 11 hours and 5 minutes later, Isner triumphed over Mahut in a record match of 6-4, 3-6, 6-7, 7-6, 70-68. Yes, that's right 70-68.. It was simply unbelievable. Even if you weren't a tennis fan, I do believe you would be now. I will always remember where I was when history was made....in my office, watching on my dual monitor!!! :)

* Our computer crashed at home and we had to buy a new computer. As much as I love the new one (our old one was a refurbished work station), it's a major pain to transfer everything from one computer to another. Oh the vast number of pictures...wow. I had NO IDEA that I had taken that many. I'm pretty sure that it wasn't my fault that the computer crashed. Well, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it.

*Maggie continues to keep us on our toes and in hysterics. Man that girl is funny. Now, if only I could remember some of it to share with you today. Nope. Not going to happen.

*I have a full weekend ~ starting with lunch on Saturday with my oldest (and I mean in length of friendship, not our age!) friend and Sunday we will witness my niece's (Gabriela) baptism and top it off with a birthday celebration for Gabriela (8!), Maya & Isabela (6!), Ed and Big Bobby. We always look forward to June/July when we can celebrate 5 of the 20 Crews birthdays.

Happy Weekend everybody!

Nothing....

Nothing.


Seriously, that is all I've got. Nothing.

No words of wisdom. No funny story to tell.

Nothing.

I am guessing I am not going to get many comments on this as it is hard to comment on nothing. Sometimes it is hard to comment on something, let alone nothing.

What a waste of this blog's storage capacity. Thankfully nothing does not come with pictures, so they will be thankful that I uploaded nothing to their server to go along with posting about nothing.

The fantastic thing about having nothing, at least in my opinion, is that by having nothing, I have managed to blog about something. Not much, but something ... which is terribly disheartening to me because now my post entitled "Nothing" is now about something and that just doesn't make any sense at all.

 

Seeking His Face

This morning, during my quiet time (which if I'm honest is the first time in many days that I've done this!), I prayed that God would speak to me about Maggie by giving me specific Scripture verses to cling to. She's been having some pretty tough weeks. God immediately answered my prayer. Here is what He spoke to me:

I was reading Psalm 105 and verse 4 jumped out at me:

"Look to the Lord and His strength; seek His face always." I prayed, "Lord this is what you would have me do--to rely on your strength to be Jesus to Maggie--to seek Your face when she is struggling. Lord, remind me to turn to you in the midst of the battle." "Seek His face" means prayer. God was reminding me that first and foremost with Maggie I need to be in prayer. No parenting technique will be effective without prayer. In addition, nothing is as powerful as prayer to heal her.

Psalm 105:5 says, "Remember the wonders He has done . . ." I was reminded to remember God's power, remember the miracles Jesus did, and that if He can heal the blind and lame, feed 5,000, and raise a man from the dead, He CAN heal Maggie. I am to recall to memory all that He has done through history, as well as in my own life, to remind me that He is able to heal. I am to look back and remember in order to have hope that God is going to work all things for His glory!

I then read Psalm 106:13, "But they soon forgot what He had done and did not wait for His counsel." I prayed, "Lord, let me wait for your counsel instead of turning to the world." God is on our side; He is with us in this trial. His Word has all of the answers for every situation. We need to just wait for His counsel and He will give wisdom to all who ask for it.

My next prayer was one of affirmation:

Lord, I will seek You. I will call out for wisdom, I will turn to love to cast out fear. I will ask you what the most loving thing to do is in every situation. I will wait on you. I will ask for forgiveness when I mess up. I will humble myself. I will address sin and confront the lies of the enemy and declare truth over Maggie. I will sing your praise over her. I will obey you, God. I will seek your counsel, for you are our counselor. I will not entertain negative thoughts. I will persevere in this trial because I believe in your power.

Psalm 106:24-25 says, "Then they despised the pleasant land; they did not believe His promise. They grumbled in their tents and did not obey the Lord."

I prayed: "God, maybe you do not work in situations when we 1) are not believing your promises to us and 2) we are grumbling in our "tents". We need to believe God's promises, trusting in His sovereign plan for our lives, and not grumble and complain, but to be thankful even in the midst of trials and even FOR the trials!

So, this is what God taught me in my quiet time--very simply: to continue to seek Him first through prayer, to remember what He has done in the past to know what He can and will do in Maggie's life, to not complain and to not be yoked with the world in this. We are to seek godly advice from Christians (as we have been doing) and go to His Word. I am reassured me that He is with us, that He is in control, that He sovereignly ordained this trial, and that I am not alone, I can go to Him when I am weak and He will be my strength. All praise, honor and glory to Him. May I be obedient to His call in my life to parent Maggie and may I be faithful as His humble servant.

Video of Maggie's photoshoot

Click on the link below to see a great video that Melissa put together of her photoshoot with Maggie. I couldn't love it more!!!!

"Maggie Joy..."